I am seriously sicked now, down with horrible headache.I have totally spent the whole day sleeping, now I am still down with slight headache. I think I am seriously behind time. I have yet to start CSE study. Haizzzz how huh. I am really afraid that I wont even make it past mid year now.

GP on friday was a sheer disaster. I had chosen the dumbest & most fatal question of all. Is change nessarily for better. Haizzz nevermind. I can only hope to pass now.

& Bio & Chem I can't imagine.

We see how. I am really reconsidering my options & my cards. If I really can't cope, I will just change my paths ba.

BTW I got MINDEF's letter le. The letter that I dreaded. hiazzz......

Life's bad, k, I go sleep liaozzz

Tmr I hope to go food fair, hope that my stupid headache will subside. So that I can take photos.

自做蘖不可活

Quite irritated today. Ya, I know it was our fault that we did not inform you beforhand, but what u did is really first of its kind. Threatening- if you don't go, I will leave.

GP on friday, haizz....

There's a coin that I like, I wanna buy it !!!!hahah , but it will never be in GSS, so think my poor wallet have to take the cost hahah. But I wonder if it is worth it, consider the curent metal pricing haizzzz.

不费吹挥之力，你达成了想要的。。。。。。
得饶人处，且饶人
黑白，是非，对错，公道，自在人心

If it is as simple as a word sorry...

k, I seemed quite free now i dun really know what homework I am left with other than maths & bio & tonnes of revision.

nvm, so bored now, I dun feel like in the mood to mug.... how huh?

得与矢只是一线之差

Haizz I feeling sort of the nostalgic now very funny emotion. dunno whether to be happy a not. I am definately glad that June holidays are coming real soon, but find this holiday to be pretty werid I think.There's MYE at last day & first wed & when school starts next semester there will be MYE. It's like a thorn in my eye. But nontheless I am going to take a break this time round. Afterall quite alot of change in plan for the holidays occured.

ACID camp - cancelled due to H1N1, meaning I am free for the weekend.
Teaching- thanks to what that "professional" teacher did, it is like hanging in mid air going no where.
Malaysia- we see how I thought of going after MYE since there is a long 5 day holiday after that.
Viet meet up - jeremy , ok week 2 perhaps a wednesday! & lets go GSS together ahhah
PW- dunno yet, it's like everything is upside down.
MYE- better do well or else.......

chinese oral is like so freaking la.Dunno who on earth came up with that stupid idea of having oral in front of your classmates. So what la my hands were like shaking that day & if you guys notice, the first question was seriously badly answered!! I dun even know why content was worth 1- la . I doubt I shld be getting this mark lor.Anyway I just crapped my way through & I make it hahah.

Bio test, sheer disaster, failed nevermind. I really dont know what happened I tried my best le, maybe or I didn't. haizzz

Chem test thats on the way back. I did hope that it can be DHL- deliver halfway lost. Hope that AW dun srcutinise me can liao.

Maths is so-so , quite disappointing I would say. GP - haizz so what if.

Next week is just busy, thats all I can say.
GP MYE on fridaay haizz.
oral continuation- freaking scary
CSE test
gtg do HW le.

人不为己,真的要天铸地灭吗?
路摇知马力日旧见人心

Seriously what on earth is wrong with you ! Why are you making all those stupid careless and brainless mistakes? Why are you blacking out, as though you are a lamp destined to be controlled by a switch, or a candle's glow which is affected by the strength of the wind.Why are you not performing like what you have been doing? Seriously wake up soon, before the road ends, and the doors shut.

Take it as a stepping stone? Is it really possible? Or is it something just to comfort your disstress soul? Let it be I did rather I lost my soul now and pass on . ( I shld nt be usin this word but ya pass on, I think it is a good word)

YOU NEED TO WAKE UP & BUCK UP!!!!!!

EFFORT - perhaps I am lacking this crucial element.

愿得三宝加持

命运弄人

tiring week 8

k, I am seriously going to complain today. The tests this week are freaking unfriendly ok!!!

Let's start with Bio test.K, this time round the bio test seems more like人做的.The MCQ, I have no gaurentee on how much I will get. But something I know for sure is that open ended I am either doomed to fail, or just to pass. It is like we are short changed in terms of the time & marks allocated for open ended question.A question that deserved at least 6 marks was only given 3 mark. That's not really what I want to say, cause it is normal for teachers to do that, in order to maximise the content they are testing. But the time it is seriously short leh!Anyway I still hope that the overall won't be just a pass. I did be greedy now. Or else when can I ?

Chemistry was a sheer disater. Yes, it is undeniable that I did some last minute study like two days before hand. But seriously before I did the exam I was like, yeah I more or less know the concepts. But what happened?I recieved the paper everything was like deleated? Two whole pages was empty(pls bear in mind it is excluding that stupid bonus question, which was also left blank!)Nevermind I think I am really prepared to fail & guarentee that's what I can say. haizzz

Maths, well generally if I don't make any stupid mistakes there's nothing much to regret le. Cause, other than the d2y/dx2 I didnt manage to complete in time. The rest should be alright la. cause the rest all is I really dun no one so yeah!

K, I am too sick now. Just heard that eco got some funny activicity that I must attend to . haizzzzz. There goes my holiday.....

Let's see what is in for holiday this time round.
- china studies MYE -.-lll
- Bio tutorial
- ACID camp
-Viet gang aniversary
- School teaching :) hahhah it did be fun I hink , maybe I might end up confusing students hahah
- Eco thingy
- I wanna try visit malaysia by bus!!!!
-Study MYE

各花入各眼.
生死有命,富贵在天

k, long weekend. I literatelly spent the whole holiday resting. NOw pay the price none of my homework is done. & revision is in bits & pieces nothing solid is done -.-lll

NVM le, next week I simply need some best of luck. Bio, Chem, Maths. I dunno what to say laugh hahhah or emo cry ? haizzz. life still goes on ...

Haizz tonite need to do stupid english GP le.......


"If there was another way I would not be here today. I did be back where I belong,somewhere in my heart. I should be the first to know where the road I take & go......" adapted from lyrics beauty world
挫折感

Week 7 just flew by.....like this without me accomplishing anything other than PI, which drained me out completely by thursday. Causing me to finish my GP test in the most pathetic state ever. I was struggling to keep my eyes open. But guessed that PI has suck whatever's left in me. I did not know what I nonsence I have written. It was only when I have reached the last half another than did I realise that I have craped out everything & 90% of them was wrong!!!!NVM, what's done is done, just be prepared to f...

NAFA after GP test was disaster. Failed shutter run, broad jump, & pull up. Need to break the egg. Or else 3 mths of hell will be there for me.

Went to do GPP today. Seriously, although I like the topic I am doing but I doubt the EOM will be a good one.Cause there is basically no articles on it !!!!!Anyway I dunno how but ya we will just make it ba .......

Anyway next week is common test. Bio, maths & chem come crashing in all at one go...... Lets see how I drown, elegantly or horrifying. hahahha

k, got to go edit the GPP le

佛历2553年
愿,佛光普照,佛日增辉
离苦得乐,步步高升

得饶人处怯饶人

宰相肚里能乘船
饮水思源
愿得三宝加持,愿离苦得乐

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. "

"No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."

Eternal Shakyamuni Buddha

Today PE was like first time so slck, playing hunter & polar bear with christine, jasper, julian, gabriel, ee hong, hui jie. It was like so slow. But I get a conclusion I am seriously a poor liar! Anyway I will brush up on that.

PW- hahah Hi Mr Ching, if you really see this then I can say 2 things. Congrats you found it hahhah( actually its quite easy cause before that I challenged Julian & he actually found it via my friends link, so let me guess, u get here by my friends link or by 09S02 class blog link？) & ya u think I scolded u thats all. & sorry for retorting you today. No hard feelings.( I hope ) By the way must tag ok, u say will tag one huh hahhah !!But dun spam my tag box hahahh

Anyway, it is undeniable that you are more than suitable as a PW teacher. hahahh.

人算不如天算
直至死地而又后生，真的吗？还是还魂乏术了？

Went to MINDS today for ACID camp 09 orientation, not really a waste of time. I learnt something.- Don't grumble so much, yes you are stress but compare yourself to others maybe you did count yourself lucky le. Although they may be slower, they really led a life. A carefree one. Yes they can be quite diffcult to deal with at times, I don't deny that, but they are simply in their world, away from this cruel factual place we are in.

Heaven's fair afterall, you are born in a safe comfort place, thus you have to pay a price for it. The stress & the high standard of living.

But after todays sort of orientation, I find that perhaps its right for me to sign up for the camp :) The volunteers (from NUS & NTU) are really helpful. & thanks to help from Ying Qin & gang , if not I would have screwed today.

-------------------------
Anyway I really want my holidays. I need a break! Ronald's right , quick raise the flu alert to red, & I can be at home. I did like to be a hermit crab for once, have a shell to shield myself from this utterly fast paced , cruelly tunned society I am in!

k, need to go rush PI le, tmr will be another day out. But I am glad, tomorrow's trip is worth making.

"If there's a chance, all I want is the meaning to my whole life everyday." Beauty World - Suddenly

望尘莫及,迷失的高羊.

Eco board

Bio experiment

MPR5 if I am not wrong, first time inside, pretty big thats all i can say

Hazel sleeping during PW last week hahah

Bio prac this week

Bio tutorial

Eco bazzar hahhah selling orchids.

Done, bascially other than the cantoment trip not up this was what I had been doing.

ok! It is offically stupid to feel stress now, especially when it is labour day holiday & I am like packed with homework??? I actually wanted to go make new spects one but by the looks of it haizzz.& tmr till gt dunno what camp training to attend to, luckily I only signed up for one day only or else I can really forgo about making a one day trip cross the boarder to get some cheap secret recipe. hehheh Next week's vesak, & mother's day will be spent on mugging for everyone, thats what I predicted. Cause based on latest news, all three H2 subjects that S02 has undertake is going to hold their deparmental test(sounds so classy isn't it the same as common tests?) on the same week. So bascially maths, chemistry and biology is going to rush in at one go like tusnami.

Actually Ronald I dont mind them having the alert raised to red now, school will close & stuff. but yeah may be you r right, test will still be here they wont go.........

we'll see how later........

无奈

Its quite crazy of me to be here right now at 11.30+++ but ya. As usual homework not done. still gt enzymes untouched. I just wanna go sleep le so tiring. The weather today was freaking hot, making me felt so lathargic & restless. Ended up napping for 2 hours after reaching home. Yeah ! will be meeting jeremy tmr I am so glad that we will be meeting tmr !!!!. He seems quite stressed out. Anyway proteins is driving me crazy!!!!! I dont even understand a sing;e thing although Mr wong had completed the tutorials !!!!!

Enough for today.Tmr still got dreadful PE. haizz life's bad.

If I am here then I suppose every road should be wrong........

光

K, I am very much behind time now, most probably there would either be people who had finished enzyme tutorial & started bio revision & stuff or at least completed their HW lists but I think I will have a long way to go for tonite..... nvm liao la, I have enough le......

I dun really feel like going to school sometimes.It doesnt really seems to be a friendly college although undeniably the teachers are trying to slow down to let us catch up but I am just not having a reason for what I am doing now. I have a dream as a motivation. Is it funny ? But I thought I am not desperate enough perhaps I should just buck up, chat less, blog less, sleep less & I dont really know what to do.........

Last week had been fun but tiring.Eco week, sold 13 pots of orchids, bought mushrooms, went for a seriously meaningful talk & yeah it was first time I find such talks useful& I realise that stupid eco week should have been last week instead then my PI would have been better.Went for NE research, nvm I thought it seems to be more like a photo trip, ate & went home.

I need to piroritise my time, differentiate needs from wants, dos & don't before I see all the carrots flying in instead of the apples I want.

Last week GP test was I dont know what to say,I think I have craped myself throgh, I doubt it will be graded pass. Chinese test was sheer disaster what a bad start. A pass would be something lucky, if not that will be the first chinese test I failed since dunno when... if it is really 好的开始就是成功的一半, I did foresee nothing more than B which is something I dont want!!!!!!

As for PI hahhah, I dont know I am loosing the faith I used to have....... Things doesnt seems to go the way I have wanted.I doubt .....

I find last week quite fruitful but I am still feeling quite vain & down dunno why.Anyway I hope they don't swap wednesday's timetable with friday's.

Pictures we see how next friday

路是人走出来的

Dunno why I am feeling quite fed up in school nowadays.Piles of work just rush in & I am really not in any mood to complete them. Can anyone like pls tell me what on earth should I do to get back that mugging mood ???Anyway this week is fun have quite alot of first time experience.

1st time saw a road accident, a taxi hit a motorcycle & the motorcyclist actually fell down.......
1st time enter the staff room, it is big cramp & messy!!!
1st time walk through the general office theres two huge white boards!!!
1st time speaking to people from Nparks.
1st time selling things in pj -.-lll
1st time doing a GP essay !!! I think I screwed the thing

k, nvm tmr got chinese CA & maths quiz need to go study liao...........

願得智慧真明了

Feeling quite wrong nowadays. I just do not feel right.There's simply too much homework that I have started to be numbed by them . Their ever presence seems to no longer hold much impact on me anymore.I am not functioning !!!!! & there's still tests thats coming like tusnami.........

I don't know if I have studied enough but based on the analysis reports I dont seems to have done enough theres always rooms for improvemnent for sure. But where's the keys to these rooms???

PW & Bio is really driving the nerves out of me....... the apple on the chinese tree no longer seems within reach,neither is it lucrative as the past anymore........ the paper that meant to be general seems too unfriendly.......... the formulae of chemistry of successs is lost!!!!!

I am trying to ignore what I see & heard but sometimes sensitive words & phrases just drops into your ears without you knowing it. I did like to be less sensitive but how?

I need a break soon........ a long one before I get my chance to visit a counsellor or even a mental institute...

alrights no point emoing anymore get back to earth & start work before trouble befalls.

一着不慎,满盘皆输
休息是为了走更长的路,但似乎这一路并非如此.
愿得一切真明了.

PSB academy didnt manage to take the front view, which is much nicer.

the big tables inside the classrooms used for the HSK exam

Chinese on friday, literally everyone is asleep hahahh.

Busy week, ahead. Chinese, GP, china studies & maths test ..........

HSK today was ok la compared o the mock paper, but I doubt I can get grade 8. There's simply too much chinese words which I dun know how to write & the comprehension , why they like to ask, what is the suitable title or moral of the story? I hate this kind of questions!

Homework, I dun seems to be liking them... I am like trying to run away from it. Dunno why.

逃避

往日所造诸罪过,皆由无始贪与痴

This whole growing up process is really tiring me, draining me out. Life is simply a daily routine route to school for lectures, tutorals , recess, lunch which is usually spent on eating, home I go. mundane & banal- I suppose this should be how I describe my life. Actually I dont really mind leading a life of solitaire now, at least stress can be more manageable than now.

Anyway bio test is sheer failure. But as what Nicholas had said- As a disciple of Mr sham, I should have pass. Ya I managed to just pass, exceed sub-pass thanks to the two MCQs which I literally gambled with. But so what? Am I there to just scrape a pass? Or should I be obtaining something better? This test only showed 2 things- 1st I am a failure at time management, be it during exams or exam preparations. 2nd I am not doing enough, I need to buck up or else I can count my time to doomsday.

Somehow Gabriel Wong's words brings me back to sec 3, the first physics test, everyone or rather alot failed but some pass with flying colours like cai ling hahhah. He actually said the same stuffs as what Queck said- this is the worst results I have ever seen for the first test, just that he placed it across unitentionally. (* Initially he actually wanted to encourage us but somehow I think it was really too bad that he had to spur us by another method.)

But the side effects of the bio test is really taking effect now. People are bucking up. I can sense that, as usual the sensitive me. I better pick up the pace before I get threatened.

HSK on saturday, I hoped that bio dun repeat itself.
PW - I am really feeeling kinda hopeless. Persistence thats what I need or else I did collapse halfway.
PE- I am running , but other components still dun fall in place. I dun really want to waste 3 months in stupid a... .
CL-Erm, ok la nthing much but seriously my chinese standards are not really comparable to those days anymore. Even cooking up a simple paragraph of 50words seems tedious enough to wipe off 30 mintues.
GP- I am really glad that suzanah was aware of the sleeepy state we were in today.
Maths & Chem - speechless I need practise before I see history repeating itself.

Next week eco week, so ma fan......

Enough of complains liaozz, need to go rush homework le. I spent my evening sleeping now pay the price......

既然选择上了这艘船,只好划下去.
希望真的是船到桥头自然直.
复杂